A few Great Articles
Single Handle Every Task
Eat that frog! Every bit of planning, prioritizing and organizing comes down to this simple concept.
Your ability to select your most important task, to begin it and then to concentrate on it single mindedly until it is complete is the key to high levels of performance and personal productivity.
The Requirement for Every Great Achievement
Every great achievement of mankind has been preceded by a long period of hard, concentrated work until the job was done. Single handling requires that once you begin, you keep working at the task, without diversion or distraction, until the job is 100% complete. You keep urging yourself onward by repeating the words "Back to work!" over and over whenever you are tempted to stop or do something else.
Reduce Your Time By 50%
By concentrating single mindedly on your most important task, you can reduce the time required to complete it by 50% or more.
It has been estimated that the tendency to start and stop a task, to pick it up, put it down and come back to it can increase the time necessary to complete the task by as much as 500%.
Each time you return to the task, you have to familiarize yourself with where you were when you stopped and what you still have to do. You have to overcome inertia and get yourself going again. You have to develop momentum and get into a productive work rhythm.
Develop Energy and Enthusiasm
But when you prepare thoroughly and then begin, refusing to stop or turn aside until the job is done, you develop energy, enthusiasm and motivation. You get better and better and more productive. You work faster and more effectively.
Never Waste Time
The truth is that once you have decided on your number one task, anything else that you do other than that is a relative waste of time. Any other activity is just not as valuable or as important as this job, based on your own priorities.
Action Exercises
Eat That Frog! Take action! Resolve today to select the most important task or project that you could complete and then launch into it immediately.
Once you start your most important task, discipline yourself to persevere without diversion or distraction until it is 100% complete. See it as a "test" to determine whether you are the kind of person who can make a decision to complete something and then carry it out. Once you begin, refuse to stop until the job is finished.
The Law of Integrity
Great business leadership is characterized by honesty, truthfulness, and straight dealing with every person, under all circumstances. This law requires that you be impeccably honest with yourself and others. As Emerson said, "Guard your integrity as a sacred thing. Nothing is at last sacred by the integrity of your own mind." Integrity lies at the core of leadership, at the heart of the leader. Everything you do revolves around the person you really are inside. And the person you are inside is always demonstrated by your actions, the things you do and say.
Leadership Defined
Leadership has been defined as the "ability to get followers." For people to follow you, to subordinate their interests to yours, they must be able to believe in you and be willing to commit their time, money, and energy to you. Leadership is therefore a trust conferred upon you by others. To earn this trust, to deserve this trust, you must be true to yourself. Only then can you live in truth with everyone else in your life and work.
Be a Good Role Model
Perhaps the most important thing you do as a leader is to be a good role model. Lead by example. Walk the talk. Live the life. Always carry yourself as though everyone is watching, even when no one is watching. Good leaders are completely reliable. People can take them at their word and trust that they will do what they say. They make promises carefully, and then always keep their word.
Consistency
A key mark of integrity in human relations is consistency, both internal and external. The best leaders are consistent from one day to the next, from one situation to the next. Because of this internal consistency, these leaders are trusted. People know what to expect. There are no surprises.
Two Basic Types of Leadership
There are two basic types of leadership in business today, transactional and transformational. Transactional leadership is the ability to direct people, manage resources, and get the job done. But transformational leadership, the most important form of leadership today, is the ability to motivate, inspire, and bring people to higher levels of performance.
Transformational Leadership
Transformational Leadership is the ability to touch people emotionally, to empower them to be more and to contribute more than they ever have before. This ability enables transformational leaders to elicit extraordinary performance from ordinary people.
Action Exercise
Resolve to live in truth with yourself and with every person and situation in your life. Listen to your body and trust your intuition. Identify the main stress points and people problems in your life and then ask yourself, what is the right thing to do in this situation to resolve this problem and alleviate this stress?
Clarify Your Values
Decide What You Stand For
What are your values? What do you stand for? What are the organizing principles of your life? What are your core beliefs? What virtues do you aspire to, and hold in high regard when you see them demonstrated by others? What will you not stand for? What would you sacrifice for, suffer for, and even die for? These are extremely important questions that are only asked by about three percent of the population, and that small minority tends to be the movers and shakers in every society. What are your values? What do you stand for? What are the organizing principles of your life? What are your core beliefs? What virtues do you aspire to, and hold in high regard when you see them demonstrated by others? What will you not stand for? What would you sacrifice for, suffer for, and even die for? These are extremely important questions that are only asked by about three percent of the population, and that small minority tends to be the movers and shakers in every society.
Write Out Your Key Values
When I first began this values clarification exercise some years ago, I wrote out a list of 163 qualities that I aspired to. I think I eventually came up with every virtue, value or positive descriptive adjective that referred to personality and character in the dictionary. And I agreed with all of them. I felt that they were all important and I wanted to incorporate every single one of them into my character.
Focus on Very Few Core Beliefs
But then reality sets in. I realized that it is very hard to learn even one new quality, or to change even one thing about myself, let alone dozens of things. So I scaled down my ambitions and began narrowing the values down to a small number that I could manage and work with. Once I had settled on about five core beliefs, I was then able to get to work on myself and start making some progress in character development.
Select Your Five Key Values
You should do the same. You should write down the five values that you feel are the most important for you to live by. Once you have those five values, you then organize them in order of priority. Which is the most important value in your hierarchy of values? Which would be second? Which would be third, and go on?
Learn to Make Better Decisions
Every choice or decision you make is based on your values. Whenever you decide between alternatives, you invariably choose the alternative that you value the most. Because you can only do one thing at a time, everything you do is a demonstration of what you consider to be the most important at that moment. Therefore, organizing your values in an order of priority is the starting point of personal strategic planning. It is only when you are clear about what you value, and in what order, that you are capable of planning and organizing the other activities of your life.
Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action:
First, clarify your core beliefs and your unifying principles. Write them down and compare your life today with the values that are really important to you. How are you doing?
Second, organize your values in order of their importance to you. Which of your values is most important? Which is second? And so on. Do your current choices reflect this order of values?
Concentrate on Your Resources
The Principle of Mass requires that you concentrate on your best people, your best energies, and your limited resources in those areas where the greatest victories are possible. Restructure and reorganize your activities so that your best talents are focused on those results that can get you out of the crunch faster than any others.
Stay Flexible
The Principle of Maneuver is one of the greatest battlefield successes; it requires that you out-maneuver your enemy by attacking from the flank or the rear. In business, the practice of this principle requires that you try something new, and if that doesn't work, try something else. Be flexible and creative in your approach. Think of doing exactly the opposite of what you have done up until now. Keep all your options open. Survival and victory are your only considerations.
Gather All Available Information
The Principle of Intelligence means that you must get the facts about the situation. Learn everything you can. Ask questions, phone people, go onto the Internet. The more and better information you have, the better and more effective decisions you will be able to make.
Get Everyone Working Together
Concerted Action makes sure that everyone on your team is working together with common goals, common values, and clearly understood work assignments. Everyone should know what is going on and what everyone else is doing. One of the rules for military victory is that you never trust to luck or wish that something will turn up. Hope is not a strategy. Look to yourself and don't expect an easy victory.
Napoleon
Napoleon was once asked if he believed in luck in warfare. He replied, "Yes, I believe in luck. I believe in bad luck, and I believe that I will always have it. I therefore plan accordingly." You should do the same. If you do have a streak of good luck, consider yourself blessed. But don't count on it or hope for it to happen.
You're the Boss!
Unity of Command is a military strategy that means that everyone must know that you are completely in command. You are in charge of your financial future. You are calling the shots. Everyone reports to you and answers to you. You can go back to democratic consensus later, but during crunch time, it must be clear to everyone that you are the boss.
Total Commitment to Your Financial Success
Finally, in taking action to resolve a crisis, perhaps the most important quality you can have is a total commitment to your financial success, to winning, to overcoming your difficulties, no matter what they are. The key to financial victory is for you to go on the attack, relentlessly moving forward. It has been said that boldness and audacity will get you into a lot of problems, but more, boldness and audacity will get you out of your problems as well. Take action immediately, and keep on taking action until you win.
Action Exercise
Identify the goal that you must attain, usually financial, to resolve the crisis and get out of the crunch. Be sure that everyone is clear on this one objective.
Five Steps to Delegating and Supervising
The ability to delegate is one of the key result areas of management. Fortunately, it is a skill that can be learned with practice. Delegation is an art as well as a science. Effective delegation requires time, thought, and careful consideration. It is something that you must learn to do if you want to leverage yourself to the maximum.
Step One
The first step in delegation is to become perfectly clear about the results that you desire from the job. The greater clarity you have with regard to the results expected, the easier it is for you to select the right person to do the job.
Step Two
The second step is to select a person based on his or her demonstrated ability or success at doing this job. Never delegate an important job to a person who has never done it before. If the successful completion of the task is important to the success of your business, it is essential that you delegate it to someone who you confidently believe can complete the task satisfactorily.
Step Three
Third, explain to the person exactly what you want done, the results that you expect, the time schedule that you require, and your preferred method of working. The reason that you are in a position to delegate a task is because you have probably already mastered this task. Taking the time to teach and explain the best way to do the task based on your experience is an excellent way to ensure that the task will be done as you wish and on schedule.
Step Four
Step four is to set up a schedule for reporting on progress. If it is an important task, set up a deadline for completion that is a day or a week before your actual deadline. Always build some slack into the system. Then, check on the progress of the task regularly, very much like a doctor would check on the condition of a critical care patient. Leave nothing to chance.
Step Five
Step five, inspect what you expect. Delegation is not abdication. Just because you have assigned a task to another person does not mean that you are no longer accountable. And the more important the task, the more important it is that you keep on top of it.
Action Exercise
What task can you effectively delegate to someone else? Which one of your employees can handle the task efficiently?
Three Skills to Improve Conversation
One key to becoming a great conversationalist is to pause before replying. A short pause, of three to five seconds, is a very classy thing to do in a conversation. When you pause, you accomplish three goals simultaneously.
The Benefits of Pausing
First, you avoid running the risk of interrupting if the other person is just catching his or her breath before continuing. Second, you show the other person that you are giving careful consideration to his or her words by not jumping in with your own comments at the earliest opportunity. The third benefit of pausing is that you will actually hear the other person better. His or her words will soak into a deeper level of your mind and you will understand what he or she is saying with greater clarity. By pausing, you mark yourself as a brilliant conversationalist.
Ask Questions
Another way to become a great conversationalist is to question for clarification. Never assume that you understand what the person is saying or trying to say. Instead, ask, "How do you mean, exactly?"
This is the most powerful question I've ever learned for controlling a conversation. It is almost impossible not to answer. When you ask, "How do you mean?" the other person cannot stop himself or herself from answering more extensively. You can then follow up with other open-ended questions and keep the conversation rolling along.
Paraphrase the Speaker's Words
The third way to become a great conversationalist is to paraphrase the speaker's words in your own words. After you've nodded and smiled, you can then say, "Let me see if I've got this right. What you're saying is . . ."
Demonstrate Attentiveness
By paraphrasing the speaker's words, you demonstrate in no uncertain terms that you are genuinely paying attention and making every effort to understand his or her thoughts or feelings. And the wonderful thing is, when you practice effective listening, other people will begin to find you fascinating. They will want to be around you. They will feel relaxed and happy in your presence.
Listening Builds Trust
The reason why listening is such a powerful tool in developing the art and skill of conversation is because listening builds trust. The more you listen to another person, the more he or she trusts you and believes in you.
Listening also builds self-esteem. When you listen attentively to another person, his or her self-esteem will naturally increase.
Listening Develops Discipline
Finally, listening builds self-discipline in the listener. Because your mind can process words at 500-600 words per minute, and we can only talk at about 150 words per minute, it takes a real effort to keep your attention focused on another person's words. If you do not practice self-discipline in conversation, your mind will wander in a hundred different directions. The more you work at paying close attention to what the other person is saying, the more self-disciplined you will become. In other words, by learning to listen well, you actually develop your own character and your own personality.
Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, make a habit of pausing before replying in any conversation or discussion. You will be amazed at how powerful this technique really is.
Second, continually ask, "How do you mean?" in response to anything that is not perfectly clear. This gives you even more time to listen well.
Paraphrase the Speaker's Words
The third way to become a great conversationalist is to paraphrase the speaker's words in your own words. After you've nodded and smiled, you can then say, "Let me see if I've got this right. What you're saying is . . ."
Demonstrate Attentiveness
By paraphrasing the speaker's words, you demonstrate in no uncertain terms that you are genuinely paying attention and making every effort to understand his or her thoughts or feelings. And the wonderful thing is, when you practice effective listening, other people will begin to find you fascinating. They will want to be around you. They will feel relaxed and happy in your presence.
Listening Builds Trust
The reason why listening is such a powerful tool in developing the art and skill of conversation is because listening builds trust. The more you listen to another person, the more he or she trusts you and believes in you.
Listening also builds self-esteem. When you listen attentively to another person, his or her self-esteem will naturally increase.
Listening Develops Discipline
Finally, listening builds self-discipline in the listener. Because your mind can process words at 500-600 words per minute, and we can only talk at about 150 words per minute, it takes a real effort to keep your attention focused on another person's words. If you do not practice self-discipline in conversation, your mind will wander in a hundred different directions. The more you work at paying close attention to what the other person is saying, the more self-disciplined you will become. In other words, by learning to listen well, you actually develop your own character and your own personality.
Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, make a habit of pausing before replying in any conversation or discussion. You will be amazed at how powerful this technique really is.
Second, continually ask, "How do you mean?" in response to anything that is not perfectly clear. This gives you even more time to listen well.
Lengthen your workday but increase your time off.
By starting your workday a little earlier, working through lunchtime, and staying a little later, you can become one of the most productive people in your field.
Work harder at what you do.
When you are at work, concentrate on work all the time you are there. Don't squander your time or fall into the habit of treating the workplace as a community where socializing is acceptable.
Pick up the pace. At work, develop a sense of urgency and maintain a quicker tempo in all your activities. Get on with the job. Dedicate yourself to moving quickly from task to task.
Work smarter.
Focus on the value of the tasks you complete. While the number of hours you put in is important, what matters most is the quality and quantity of results you achieve.
Align your work with your skills.
Skill and experience count. You achieve more in less time when you work on tasks at which you are especially skilled or experienced.
Bunch your tasks.
Group similar activities and do them all at the same time. Making all your calls, completing all your estimates, or preparing all your presentation slides at the same time allows you to develop speed and skill at each activity.
Cut out steps.
Pull several parts of the job together into a single task and eliminate several steps. Where you can, cut lower-value activities completely.
Action Exercise
What are your ten most important goals? Carefully review your ten most important goals. Select one that, if achieved immediately, would have the strongest positive impact on your life.
The "Acid Test" of Listening
Paraphrase Your Customer's Words
The customer is only sure that you have been listening when you paraphrase what the prospect has said and feed it back in your own words. This is where the rubber meets the road in effective listening. This is where you demonstrate in no uncertain terms to the prospect that your listening has been real and sincere. This is where you show the prospect that you were paying complete attention to what he or she was saying. Paraphrasing is how you prove it.
Question for Clarification
When the prospect has finished explaining his or her situation to you, and you have paused, and then questioned for clarification, you paraphrase the prospects primary thoughts and concerns, and feed them back to him or her in your own words.
Use the Right Words
For example, you might say, "Let me make sure I understand exactly what you are saying. It sounds to me like you are concerned about two things more than anything else, and that in the past you have had a couple of experiences that have made you very careful in approaching a decision of this kind."
Feed it Back Accurately
You then go on to feed back to the prospect exactly what he or she has told you, pausing and questioning for clarification as you go, until the customer says words to the effect of, "Yes, that's it! You've got it exactly."
Earn the Right to Sell
Only when you and the customer completed a thorough "examination" and have mutually agreed on the "diagnosis" you are in a position to begin talking to the customer about your product or service. In general terms, this means that you can not pull out your brochures and price lists and begin telling the customer how your product or service can solve his problems or achieve his goals until about seventy percent of the way through the sales conversation. Until then, you have not yet earned the right. Until then, you don't even know enough to begin an intelligent presentation without embarrassing yourself.
Be a Good Listener
The more and better you listen, the more and better people will like you, trust you and want to do business with you. The more they will want to get involved with you as a person and the more popular you will be with them. Excellent listeners are welcome everywhere, in every walk of life, and they eventually and ultimately arrive at the top of their fields.
Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, remember that your first job in the sale is to get the customer to like you and believe that you understand his situation. Paraphrasing is the way you accomplish this.
Second, be sure that the customer agrees with you completely when you feed back his concerns to him. Only then can you really start selling.
Counterattack!
When you-know-what hits the fan and the survival of your business is endangered, you must begin thinking like a military commander in battle. Often the situation is so serious that you have to step forward and make hard decisions, and make them immediately. No more Mr. Nice Guy.
Military Strategy
Top military leaders have been studied going back to 600 B.C. Over the centuries, several principles of military strategy that lead to the victory of defeat have been identified. They are now taught to student officers in every military school in the world. By applying these principles of military strategy to your life and your business, you can often turn the situation around and achieve extraordinary results.
Be Clear in Your Objective
The first principle of military strategy is the Principle of the Objective. It requires that you be perfectly clear about the goal (or goals) that you want and need to get through a crunch point. In business, the practice of this principle is usually focused on goals related to sales, revenues, and cash flow. You need plans, schedules, and the right people doing the right jobs to achieve your most important objectives. Everyone should be absolutely clear about what they are expected to do, and they must be committed to success, to victory, no matter how serious the crisis.
Take Bold Action
The second strategic principle is the Principle of the Offensive. It requires that you take action—that you move forward boldly to confront your difficulties and solve your problems. As Napoleon said, "No great battles are ever won on the defensive." Since your natural tendency when you hit crunch time is to withdraw, cut back, and play it safe, you must resist this urge and instead dare to go forward, to seize control of the situation, and to attack your difficulties with firmness and decisiveness.
Crunch Point Mantra
Whenever one of my companies has experienced a cash crunch, my mantra is, "When in doubt, sell your way out." You cannot cost-cut your way out of a financial crisis. You have to generate revenues, and the only way to do that is by selling something to someone. Always think in terms of generating revenues from sales. Become very aggressive and focused in this area. Every single company that has rebounded from a crisis, including companies like IBM in 1991, turned itself around by focusing single-mindedly on generating sales revenues. You should do the same.
Action Exercise
Discipline yourself to focus single-mindedly on this number-one target, resisting temptations to clear up small things at first.
Managing and Motivating: Five Ingredients
Thousands of employees were interviewed about what they considered to be a "great place to work." The answers they gave were different from what the managers expected.
First Ingredient
The first ingredient of a good job was "challenging, interesting work." This is work that kept the employee busy and involved all day long.
Second Ingredient
The second ingredient was a feeling of being "in the know." A good job was defined as one where the employee felt that he or she was fully informed on what was happening in the company. The employee felt like an insider, like an important part of a larger group.
Third Ingredient
The third ingredient of a great place to work was a "high trust" environment. This was defined as a job where a person could feel free to do his or her best and to make mistakes, without being criticized or fired. When employees felt that they were free to make mistakes with no punishment or hostility, they enjoyed their work much more, became more creative, and worked more effectively with other people.
Fourth Ingredient
The fourth ingredient in a good job was a caring boss and friendly co-workers. Often, the human environment was more important than anything else. People like to work in a place where they get along well with everyone. The happier they felt their work relationships, the better they worked, the lower the level of absenteeism was, and the more productive they were.
Fifth Ingredient
The fifth ingredient for a good job turned out to be good pay and opportunities for promotion and advancement. To the surprise of many managers, the issue, of pay was number five among factors that constituted a good job or a great place to work. Psychologists have found that a certain level of pay is essential for people to feel comfortable with their jobs, but above that level, it does not have much motivational impact. It is only when pay is sub-standard or below what would normally be expected for such a job that it becomes a de-motivating influence.
Action Exercise
Take the time to study your workplace, pay special attention to see if you have all five ingredients of managing and motivating in your workplace.
The Three Mental Barriers to Time Power
If everyone agrees that excellent time management is a desirable skill, why is it that so few people can be described as "well organized, effective, and efficient?" Over the years, I have found that many people have ideas about time management that are simply not true. But if you believe something to be true, it becomes true for you.
Your beliefs cause you to see yourself and the world, and your relationship to time management, in a particular way. If you have negative beliefs in any area, these beliefs will affect your thinking and actions, and will eventually become your reality. You are not what you think you are, but what you think, you are.
Barrier 1: Worries About Organization
The first myth of negative belief, of time management is that if you are too well organized, you become cold, calculating, and unemotional. Some people feel that they will lose their spontaneity and freedom if they are extremely effective and efficient.
Many people hide behind this false idea and use it as an excuse for not disciplining themselves the way they know they should. The fact is that people who are disorganized are not spontaneous; they are merely confused, and often frantic. The key is structuring and organizing everything that you possibly can: Thinking ahead; planning for contingencies; preparing thoroughly and focusing on specific results. Only then can you be completely relaxed and spontaneous when the situation changes.
The better organized you are in the factors that are under your control, the greater freedom and flexibility you have to quickly make changes whenever they are necessary.
Barrier 2: Negative Mental Programming
The second mental barrier to developing excellent time management skills is negative programming, which is often picked up from your parents, but also from other influential people as you are growing up.
If your parents or others told you that were a messy person, or that you were always late, or that you never finished anything you started, chances are that as an adult, you may still be operating unconsciously to obey these earlier commands.
Time management and personal efficiency skills are disciplines that we learn and develop with practice and repetition. If we have developed bad time management habits, we can unlearn them. We can replace them with good habits over time.
Barrier 3: Self-Limiting Beliefs
The third mental barrier to good time management skills is a negative self-concept, or what are called "self-limiting beliefs." Many people believe that they don't have the ability to be good at time management. They often believe that it is an inborn part of their background or heritage. But there is no gene or chromosome for poor time management, or good time management, for that matter. Your personal behaviors are very much under your own control.
Action Exercise
Imagine that someone were to offer you a million dollars to manage your time superbly for the next thirty days. Imagine that an efficiency expert was going to follow you around with a clipboard and a video camera for one month. After thirty days if you had used your time efficiently and well, working on your highest priorities all day, every day, you will receive a prize of one million dollars. How efficient would you be over the next thirty days?
Be An Optimist at All Times
Everyone wants to be physically healthy. You want to be mentally healthy as well. The true measure of "mental fitness" is how optimistic you are about yourself and your life.
In this newsletter, you learn how to control your thinking in very specific ways so that you feel terrific about yourself and your situation, no matter what happens.
Control Your Reactions and Responses
There are three basic differences in the reactions of optimists and pessimists. The first difference is that the optimist sees a setback as temporary, while the pessimist sees it as permanent. The optimist sees an unfortunate event, such as an order that falls through or a sales call that fails, as a temporary event, something that is limited in time and that has no real impact on the future. The pessimist, on the other hand, sees negative events as permanent, as part of life and destiny.
Isolate the Incident
The second difference between the optimist and the pessimist is that the optimist sees difficulties as specific, while the pessimist sees them as pervasive. This means that when things go wrong for the optimist, he looks at the event as an isolated incident largely disconnected from other things that are going on in his life.
See Setbacks as Temporary Events
For example, if something you were counting on failed to materialize and you interpreted it to yourself as being an unfortunate event, but something that happens in the course of life and business, you would be reacting like an optimist. The pessimist, on the other hand, sees disappointments as being pervasive. That is, to him they are indications of a problem or shortcoming that pervades every area of life.
Don't Take Failure Personally
The third difference between optimists and pessimists is that optimists see events as external, while pessimists interpret events as personal. When things go wrong, the optimist will tend to see the setback as resulting from external factors over which one has little control.
If the optimist is cut off in traffic, for example, instead of getting angry or upset, he will simply downgrade the importance of the event by saying something like, "Oh, well, I guess that person is just having a bad day."
The pessimist on the other hand, has a tendency to take everything personally. If the pessimist is cut off in traffic, he will react as though the other driver has deliberately acted to upset and frustrate him.
Remain Calm and Objective
The hallmark of the fully mature, fully functioning, self-actualizing personality is the ability to be objective and unemotional when caught up in the inevitable storms of daily life. The superior person has the ability to continue talking to himself in a positive and optimistic way, keeping his mind calm, clear and completely under control. The mature personality is more relaxed and aware and capable of interpreting events more realistically and less emotionally than is the immature personality. As a result, the mature person exerts a far greater sense of control and influence over his environment, and is far less likely to be angry, upset, or distracted.
Take the Long View
Look upon the inevitable setbacks that you face as being temporary, specific and external. View the negative situation as a single event that is not connected to other potential events and that is caused largely by external factors over which you can have little control. Simply refuse to see the event as being in any way permanent, pervasive or indicative of personal incompetence of inability.
Resolve to think like an optimist, no matter what happens. You may not be able to control events but you can control the way you react to them.
Action Exercises
Now, here are three actions you can take immediately to put these ideas into action.
First, remind yourself continually that setbacks are only temporary, they will soon be past and nothing is as serious as you think it is.
Second, look upon each problem as a specific event, not connected to other events and not indicative of a pattern of any kind. Deal with it and get on with your life.
Third, recognize that when things go wrong, they are usually caused by a variety of external events. Say to yourself, "What can't be cured must be endured," and then get back to thinking about your goals.
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