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Showing posts from July 7, 2021

5 Mistakes Parents Make With Teens and Tweens

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Your child isn't a little kid anymore. They're a teen, or a tween -- and it's time to tweak your parenting skills to keep up with them. Yes, they're probably moodier now than when they were young. And you have new things to think about, like curfews, dating, new drivers, and friends who make you raise your eyebrows. No doubt about it: Your teen, or tween, will test your limits, and your patience. But they're still your child. And, though they won't admit it, they still need you! The key is knowing what efforts are worth it, and which ones backfire. 1. Expecting the Worst Teenagers get a bad rap, says Richard Lerner, PhD, director of the Institute for Applied Research in Youth Development at Tufts University. Many parents approach raising teenagers as an ordeal, believing they can only watch helplessly as their lovable children transform into unpredictable monsters. But that sets you -- and your teen -- up for several unhappy, unsatisfying years together. “The me

Gameplan for Positive Parenting Your Teen

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Positive parenting a teenager? A terrific teen who's responsible, considerate, shows good judgment, at least most of the time? Yes, it is possible! Here's your game plan, with 12 essential Tips. You may not feel like you have much influence on your child these days, but teens’ behavior is highly correlated with the strength of their bonds with their parents. Good relationships between teenagers and their parents, as rated by both, are positively correlated with school success and general happiness as rated by the teen, and also by those around her. By contrast, weak or conflictual parent/teen relationships are correlated with early sexual activity, experimentation with drugs and alcohol, the teen's involvement in violence (as either perpetrator or victim), and suicide. How do you parent this blossoming person who sometimes seems to be becoming a stranger? 12 Essential Tips: 1. Remember you're a parent, AND a friend. Teens crave the security of knowing their parents unde

7 Tips for Raising Caring Kids

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  Research in human development clearly shows that the seeds of empathy, caring, and compassion are present from early in life, but that to become caring, ethical people, children need adults to help them at every stage of childhood to nurture these seeds into full development. We should work to cultivate children’s concern for others because it’s fundamentally the  right  thing to do, and also because when children can empathize with and take responsibility for others, they’re likely to be happier and more successful. They’ll have better relationships their entire lives, and strong relationships are a key ingredient of happiness. In today’s workplace, success often depends on collaborating effectively with others, and children who are empathic and socially aware are also better collaborators. Below are a set of guideposts to raising caring, respectful, and ethical children, along with tips for putting them into action. These guideposts are supported by many studies and by the work tha

Nine Steps to More Effective Parenting

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Here are nine child-rearing tips that can help you feel more fulfilled as a parent. 1. Boosting Your Child's Self-Esteem Kids start developing their sense of self as babies when they see themselves through their parents' eyes. Your tone of voice, your body language, and your every expression are absorbed by your kids. Your words and actions as a parent affect their developing  self-esteem  more than anything else. Praising accomplishments, however small, will make them feel proud; letting kids do things independently will make them feel capable and strong. By contrast, belittling comments or comparing a child unfavorably with another will make kids feel worthless. Avoid making loaded statements or using words as weapons. Comments like "What a stupid thing to do!" or "You act more like a baby than your little brother!" cause damage just as physical blows do. Choose your words carefully and be compassionate. Let your kids know that everyone makes mistakes and