Are We Becoming Stupid, Selfish, or Simply Losing Our Humanity?
WE HAVE SMARTPHONES, SMART CARS, SMART HOMES AND ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE.
BUT ARE WE BECOMING SMARTER HUMAN BEINGS?
We can communicate with someone on the other side of the world in seconds. Yet millions of people struggle with loneliness, and some do not have a single dependable person to call when life falls apart.
We live in an extraordinary world. We can order food without speaking to anyone, transfer money without visiting a bank, and ask artificial intelligence almost anything.
But can we still look someone in the eyes and ask, "ARE YOU OKAY?"
Can we say sorry when we are wrong? Can we listen without judging? Can we show consideration when our actions inconvenience another person?
We are becoming technologically advanced but emotionally disconnected. More informed, yet sometimes less understanding. More vocal about our rights, yet less conscious of our responsibilities.
ARE PEOPLE BECOMING STUPID? SELFISH? OR HAVE WE SIMPLY STOPPED CARING?
We Communicate More. But Do We Actually Connect?
Walk into a restaurant today. A father is scrolling through his phone. A mother is replying to messages. The children are watching videos.
Everyone is seated at the same table, yet nobody is genuinely interacting.
FOUR PEOPLE. FOUR SCREENS. FOUR DIFFERENT WORLDS.
ONE FAMILY. ZERO MEANINGFUL CONVERSATION.
We have hundreds of contacts, thousands of followers and dozens of WhatsApp groups.
But when depression strikes, when someone loses a job, when a marriage breaks down, or when a person simply needs someone to listen — how many people can they truly call?
A hundred likes cannot replace one genuine hug. A thousand followers cannot replace one dependable friend.
Access is not affection. Communication is not connection. Visibility is not friendship.
The Double-Parking Mentality: My Convenience, Your Emergency
Someone double-parks to buy food, withdraw money, collect something or run a quick errand.
They leave their vehicle blocking another car. Sometimes they do not even leave a telephone number.
When confronted, the excuses begin:
"Relax lah, only a while!"
"Why so impatient?"
"I was only gone for 15 minutes!"
But what if the affected driver has been waiting for two hours? What if the blocked vehicle belongs to a doctor rushing to an emergency? What if a child needs urgent medical attention? What if an ambulance or fire engine cannot get through?
WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO TURN YOUR CONVENIENCE INTO SOMEBODY ELSE'S EMERGENCY?
Videos circulating online have shown disputes over blocked vehicles, delays and conflicting explanations. Each incident must be judged on verified facts, but the larger behavioural problem deserves attention.
Why must an innocent person suffer because somebody else refuses to think? Why does the person creating the inconvenience sometimes become the loudest in the argument?
YOUR CAR MAY BELONG TO YOU. THE PUBLIC ROAD DOES NOT.
Your right to drive does not include a right to obstruct. Your right to park does not include a right to endanger.
Everybody Knows Their Rights. Who Remembers Their Responsibilities?
"I have my rights!" "You cannot tell me what to do!" "Who are you to question me?"
Fine. You have rights. So do I. So does the elderly person trying to cross the road, the disabled person requiring access and the neighbour who needs to leave home.
WHEN DID PERSONAL RIGHTS BECOME PERMISSION TO DISREGARD EVERYBODY ELSE'S RIGHTS?
Freedom without responsibility becomes selfishness. Confidence without humility becomes arrogance. Knowledge without wisdom becomes dangerous.
Some people are so determined to prove they are right that they are prepared to destroy relationships, humiliate others and create unnecessary conflict.
But what exactly are they winning? An argument? An ego contest? A moment of superiority?
BEING RIGHT IS NOT ALWAYS THE SAME AS DOING WHAT IS RIGHT.
Parents, Are We Raising Children or Manufacturing Entitled Adults?
We complain that today's younger generation is impatient, disrespectful, distracted and demanding.
But who introduced them to these behaviours?
- Who handed a smartphone to a toddler simply to keep the child quiet?
- Who defended a child against every teacher or coach without first establishing the facts?
- Who taught children that receiving everything they want is a sign of love?
- Who demonstrated anger, impatience and disrespect in front of them?
Not all parents are irresponsible, and not all young people lack manners. Many young people demonstrate extraordinary discipline, empathy and maturity.
But we cannot ignore an uncomfortable truth.
CHILDREN LEARN MORE FROM WHAT WE DEMONSTRATE THAN WHAT WE PREACH.
If a father double-parks and says, "Never mind, just five minutes," what lesson has the child received?
If a mother shouts at a waiter because an order is late, what has she demonstrated?
If parents spend dinner scrolling through their phones while demanding that their children communicate, what message are they sending?
PARENTS, YOUR CHILDREN ARE WATCHING YOU EVEN WHEN YOU THINK THEY ARE NOT LISTENING.
Are Schools Producing Educated People or Merely Examination Results?
We celebrate straight As, degrees, master's qualifications, PhDs, scholarships and certificates. Academic achievement deserves recognition.
But what is the value of excellent academic qualifications if a person cannot communicate respectfully, accept criticism, work with others or admit a mistake?
A graduate may solve a complex mathematical equation but struggle to resolve a simple disagreement. A manager may understand every company policy but fail to understand why an employee is struggling.
WE MEASURE INTELLIGENCE THROUGH EXAMINATIONS. BUT ARE WE DEVELOPING CHARACTER THROUGH EDUCATION?
Where are the lessons on emotional intelligence, civic responsibility, conflict resolution, listening, patience, compassion and ethical decision-making?
Academic education prepares us to earn a living. Character education prepares us to live with others.
Social Media Has Given Everyone a Microphone, But Not Necessarily Wisdom
Someone makes a mistake. Within minutes the incident can be shared with thousands.
People comment. People insult. People condemn. People become judges, lawyers and executioners from behind a screen.
Sometimes public exposure reveals genuine wrongdoing and creates accountability. But sometimes we react without understanding the full circumstances.
We watch 30 seconds of a video and believe we understand an entire incident. We read a headline and believe we know the truth.
HAVE WE BECOME A SOCIETY THAT REACTS FASTER THAN IT THINKS?
Another troubling habit is filming somebody in distress without first considering whether we can safely help.
A person falls. Phones come out. An argument erupts. Phones come out. Someone suffers an embarrassing moment. Phones come out.
IS HUMAN SUFFERING BECOMING ENTERTAINMENT?
Not every incident requires a camera. Sometimes it requires a helping hand.
Our Workplaces Are Not Immune Either
In my years observing people, leadership, operations and organisational behaviour, one pattern continues to trouble me.
Managers demand respect but refuse to give it. Leaders insist on accountability but avoid taking responsibility. Employees want recognition but resist constructive feedback.
We hold meetings about communication problems, followed by more messages that create further confusion.
When something goes wrong, the blame game begins.
"Not my department."
"Nobody informed me."
"That is not my responsibility."
"I was only following instructions."
Where has ownership gone? Where has teamwork gone? Where is the courage to say, "I made a mistake, and I will correct it"?
A workplace can have the latest technology and sophisticated reporting systems. But without integrity, trust and empathy, the organisation remains dysfunctional.
Are We Losing Our Feelings, or Simply Choosing Not to Care?
I do not believe humanity has suddenly lost its ability to feel.
During floods, disasters, accidents and personal tragedies, we still see strangers donating blood, distributing food and helping families they have never met.
Humanity is still there.
But perhaps our concern has become selective. We care when an incident goes viral. We care when it affects our family. We care when the victim resembles someone we love.
WHY MUST SUFFERING BECOME PERSONAL BEFORE COMPASSION BECOMES NECESSARY?
Why must our own car be blocked before we understand double-parking? Why must our own child be bullied before we understand another parent's pain?
Empathy means understanding another person's situation even when we are not personally affected.
Artificial Intelligence Is Growing. Is Human Intelligence Growing With It?
AI can write, calculate, analyse, design and assist with complex decisions.
A machine can generate an apology. But can we genuinely mean one?
An algorithm can recommend a response to someone who is grieving. But will we take the time to sit beside that person?
A smartphone can remind us of a birthday. But do we genuinely remember what matters to that person?
WE SHOULD NOT FEAR MACHINES BECOMING MORE INTELLIGENT AS MUCH AS WE SHOULD QUESTION WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HUMANS STOP EXERCISING JUDGEMENT, EMPATHY AND RESPONSIBILITY.
We do not need less innovation. We need more human development alongside innovation.
Ten Questions Every Parent, Individual and Leader Must Answer
These questions are not for somebody else. They are for me, for you and for all of us.
- When did I last give someone my full attention without checking my phone?
- Have I ever inconvenienced someone and justified it because I was in a hurry?
- Do I apologise sincerely when I am wrong?
- Do my children see me practising the values I teach them?
- Do I treat service workers with the same respect I give important people?
- Have I checked on someone who might be lonely, without needing anything in return?
- Do I listen to understand, or only to prepare my reply?
- When I see wrongdoing, do I respond responsibly or merely seek attention?
- Am I teaching the next generation compassion as seriously as achievement?
- If everyone behaved exactly like me, would society become better or worse?
What Must Change? And Who Must Start?
We cannot solve this problem by blaming young people, parents, teachers, politicians or technology alone.
Behaviour is influenced by family, culture, institutions, personal circumstances and the examples we see around us.
Most importantly, we must learn to correct ourselves before demanding that everyone else change.
What Kind of Human Beings Are We Becoming?
One day, the technology we celebrate today will become outdated. Smartphones will be replaced. Vehicles will become more sophisticated. Artificial intelligence will become increasingly capable.
But when someone is frightened, grieving, struggling or facing an emergency, they will still need human understanding and care.
No number of followers can guarantee that. No university degree can guarantee that. No bank balance can guarantee that.
So, returning to my original question:
ARE PEOPLE BECOMING STUPID, SELFISH, OR BOTH?
Perhaps some behaviour is rooted in ignorance. Some in entitlement. Some in selfishness. And some in a failure to think beyond ourselves.
But I believe the greatest danger is not simply a lack of intelligence.
IT IS THE NORMALISATION OF INCONSIDERATE BEHAVIOUR.
When selfishness becomes normal, kindness begins to look extraordinary.
When arrogance becomes normal, humility begins to look like weakness.
When everybody insists on rights but ignores responsibilities, society suffers.
And when human interaction becomes optional, loneliness becomes easier to overlook.
MY FINAL THOUGHT
We have taught machines how to communicate.
We have taught computers how to think.
We have taught vehicles how to navigate.
BUT HAVE WE FORGOTTEN TO TEACH HUMAN BEINGS HOW TO CARE?
Before asking whether the next generation will become smarter, perhaps we should ask whether they will become kinder.
Before demanding respect, perhaps we should examine how much respect we give.
Before complaining that society has become selfish, perhaps we should look in the mirror.
BECAUSE A BETTER SOCIETY DOES NOT BEGIN WITH EVERYBODY ELSE CHANGING. IT BEGINS WHEN WE CHANGE OURSELVES.
YOUR TURN TO REFLECT
Have we become too comfortable with selfishness, or have we simply stopped correcting behaviour that we know is wrong?
To every parent, teacher, leader and individual: What is the ONE human value we are losing most rapidly — respect, empathy, honesty, patience or responsibility?
I welcome your views, including those who disagree with me. Perhaps the first step towards rebuilding human connection is learning to have an honest conversation again.
Sharing my thoughts on life, human behaviour, parenting, leadership, responsibility and the society we are building for future generations.
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